Hey, Lady...A Spa Day Is Supposed To Be Relaxing!

All of the guys decided to travel to Dallas for the Cotton Bowl (GEAUX TIGERS!) this weekend, so Caitlin and I decided to have a little fun of our own.  We booked spa packages at a local spa.  Nestled in the quietness of the woods, we couldn't wait for our relaxing day.  As I anticipated this, a thought suddenly crept into my head...once upon a time, I scheduled a spa day at the same place, only to have a "Cathy Chatty" assigned to do my facial.  SURELY that was a one time only thing.  There was no way that it could happen again...could it?

We booked our spa packages to begin at 9 in the morning; that way we could also go to lunch afterwards and basically just mess around since the guys wouldn't be in town.  So, arriving at the quiet spa retreat, they told us we would begin the day with spa baths.  How WONDERFUL!  Laying in that hot water, reading a book on my Kindle...what a great way to start they day.  Not really being a "morning person", I loved the quietness surrounding me.  The slight knock on the door came, signaling me it was time to get out of the tub and move on to my next service...a facial.

Still tugging at the corners of my mind was the vague memory of the "Cathy Chatty" girl from before...she gave me my facial too.  Sitting in the waiting area, reading and sipping lemon water, I was beginning to unwind.  It had been a rough week with Robby having the "Man Flu" and all; sleeping on the couch had worked me over (not to mention the stress of all that Lysol spraying...).  The door opened and a cheery looking lady summoned me to come with her for my facial.  Getting up, I followed her around the corner to her treatment room.  She instructed me to get on the table and she would return shortly.  Laying there, breathing in the eucalyptus oil, I had to smile at a distant memory of a cousin who once over dramatically ran from a room containing eucalyptus, coughing and gagging because she said it cut her breathing off.  Remembering this incident and how we all howled with laughter at her, I had to wonder if she would do the same upon entering this room...or possibly quite simply faint dead away.  Anyway, it wasn't a couple of minutes before the facial technician returned.  As I lay upon the table with my eyes closed awaiting a peaceful treatment, she began to talk...OH NO!  And the things she was talking about sounded vaguely familiar.  Although this was a different woman, the stories were just as odd. In her twangy accent, she informed me that she was a certified cosmetologist in 3 states:  Tennessee, Texas and Louisiana...well, that certainly explained the accent.  And imparting that knowledge on me was truly not of much consequence...it was the following information that had me a little disturbed; or shall I say that she shared it with me was a bit disturbing.  Trying to concentrate on the soft piped in music, with strains of ocean waves beating the shore, she continued to explain HOW she ended up in Louisiana (ugh...).  She said, (and I will paraphrase just a bit) "Yea, I didn't meet my real mom until I was 24 and my real dad until I was 25.  She ended up having 3 strokes in a row...and a baby.  I had to come down here to help her out.  It's a real Jerry Springer kind of story."  At this point, I opened my eyes...looked at her and merely said, "Hmmm..."  Hey!  I know better than to ask any questions about the specifics.  It's just like a fisherman throwing a line out and you (being the fish) taking the bait.  I closed my eyes again.  That's when she began to question my about my skin.  I told her it was a bit dry and that's when she informed me that I shouldn't exfoliate more than once or twice a week.  She said that was because as we age, our skin get thinner...OK, that's true.  THEN she said, "You know, you are only allotted so many skin cells in a lifetime and once they're gone, that's it!"  WHAT?!  I let her continue to explain..."Yea, you can't make new skin cells and your skin just becomes like paper; very thin.  I never knew this until I went to college."  Now, I'm not sure about all that and will definitely have to ask Doctor Dave about not being able to make more skin cells.  Anyway, she FINALLY got started with the treatment and leaned in close to me and said, "Now, you just go to your happy place..."  ALRIGHTY THEN!

Going to my "Happy Place" was a little easier said than done.  Where I liked the smell of the eucalyptus, I began to have a little bit of anxiety as she sprayed something in my face not 1 or 2 times, but 3 TIMES! That choked me a little bit; actually made my heart race and then I would settle down again.  Next, she decided to paint a mask on my face.  This is not something unusual, but painting it over my LIPS too sort of freaked me out!  I've never had the mask put on my lips before and I surely didn't want that stuff getting in my mouth...so I just laid there very still...waiting for it to dry so I could get it all washed off.  And as I was laying there, I kept thinking about the guy who used to work there and do facials.  He was WONDERFUL (OK, girls, I'm sorry, but a gay guy just gives a much better facial than you ever could...).  Not only did he not talk while giving you a facial, he could almost put you in a trance of total relaxation where you were floating somewhere between being awake and asleep.  I longed for that kind of facial once again...I suppose it was not to be.

Later that afternoon, Robby called to see how our spa day had gone.  I told him that it was OK.  He said, "It was just OK?"  "Yea, I said...there was no need to really explain, for you see, he knows that at times my expectations are a bit higher than humanly possible.  Oh well, I did get to spend a wonderful weekend with my daughter before it was time for her to return to school...and THAT was worth every weird moment at the spa...as the say, "PRICELESS". 

No comments