One of my favorite movies is, "Father of the Bride". It doesn't matter how many times I have watched that movie; it always makes me laugh. Whenever Caitlin announced that she was engaged and we began the wedding planning, I suddenly found myself living with THE FATHER OF THE BRIDE! I was no longer laughing at that movie...I was LIVING it.
I must admit that watching someone else go through the pains of wedding planning on television is a whole lot more amusing that actually going through it oneself. As I was sitting here the other day, in the midst of yet another tumultuous wedding conversation (with the "Father of the Bride"...), I was reminded of the scene where George Banks began furiously tearing open the package of hot dog buns and saying that he was NOT going to pay for a full bag of buns because it was all a big scam since the number of buns in a bag did not coordinate with the number of hot dogs in a package. Hmmm...THAT's when I began referring to my husband as "Mr. Banks"!
You see, Robby is a businessman. Need I say more? A wedding to a businessman is nothing more than a business deal. And by "deal", I mean...He feels like he must GET a "deal"...On what? OH, just EVERYTHING! We actually call him the "Human Calculator". Now, he is not cheap, he just enjoys bartering for everything he purchases in life. Me, on the other hand...I'm the creative one. I like to peruse magazines and web sites to get "neat ideas" for everything I do. We could not be more opposite. Up until now, this has worked perfectly well for us. However, when bartering meets creativity while planning a wedding, things can go a bit awry.
Last week, the wedding topic of discussion for the week was wedding invitations. Caitlin and I had discussed some "creative" ideas we had for a very unique invitation. We both paint and are very artistic, therefore, we thought that having another artist friend of ours watercolor a design and then having the printer add the text and print the invitations was a GREAT idea. George Banks?...Hmph! He asked, "Now, WHY would we want to PAY someone EXTRA to paint an invitation for us? Do you KNOW how much that will cost? AND...besides, no one even remembers what the invitation looks like anyway." Well, That did it for me! "REALLY?!", I said. Well, if THAT'S the case, then I guess we could just hand write them then. He watched in amazement as I snatched open a drawer, took out a pen and piece of scratch paper. I proceeded to hold the pen in my fist like a five year old would hold a Big Chief Pencil and wrote in the same type of handwriting: WE'RE GETTING MARRIED. COME TO OUR WEDDING. Then explaining that since no one really noticed the invitation, why even fold it or put it in an envelope for that matter; I crumpled it up in a ball and threw it across the table. OK...I will admit that I took things a bit far with my example, but I (like Dianne Keaton/Nina Banks...) had HAD ENOUGH! Robby sat there simply watching as I eventually completed my "Mother of the Bride" tirade. To his credit (and continuation of life...) I only caught a glimpse of him slightly snickering once. When all was quiet once again, we were both just left just staring at one another; he with that silly smirk on his face and me with my hands on my hips and "I'll wipe that smirk off of your face" look. We had reached a stalemate.
After quite a bit of discussion about our different visions (my word...) concerning this wedding, we came to a conclusion. "Father of the Bride" realized that it was NOT my intention to to "Break the Bank"; just entertain some "creative options". After all, I was not wanting to remodel the house and have swans walking around the lawn. And I understood that he was not not attempting to cheapen our daughter's wedding by constantly questioning our purchases; he was merely trying to keep us within a reasonable budget for the wedding. Did we ever make a decision regarding the invitations? Well, we took the "Scarlet O'Hara Approach" to that little task by deciding to "Think about that after the holidays". Yes, art DOES imitate life, however, it is much more amusing to watch these events unfold before our eyes on the Big Screen instead of in our living rooms!